How to Support a Loved One Experiencing Infertility?
If you’re here, you most likely have a friend, child, niece, nephew, or someone close to you who’s currently battling the ups, downs, grief, and loss of infertility.
You aren’t sure if you should call them, not call them, and what you should say and do (or not say and do) to support them. Remember: Everyone’s infertility journey is different. Many facing these challenges are experiencing feelings of loss and grief, similar to when you lose a loved one. Be patient, sensitive, and understanding during this time. Your efforts and care can be vital in helping them heal.
With that, here are some helpful tips to know so you can better support your loved ones through their fertility journey.
Seek to understand what your loved one is going through
Do your research. Your loved one is going through so much emotionally and physically. Please do your part by getting educated on fertility treatment procedures, costs, and time spent. Fertility treatment is equivalent to a part or full-time job.
ASRM.org
SART.org
Infertility and family building can cause anxiety and depression. Most people are working though grief, anger, and shame
Find out what support they need to get through these tough emotions. How? Ask them. Ask them if bringing meals, walking their dog, help with home projects, or what kind of activity or service would help them feel the most loved and supported. Try to avoid activities that are high intensity, include alcohol, and involve large gatherings. Some may want a listening ear, while others don’t always want to talk about infertility and often need help via distractions.
Understand and respect their boundaries. They just can’t always show up in the same capacity they used to in supporting your needs or showing up to life events such as baby showers, kids’ birthday parties, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc..
You may mean well but certain topics and behaviors can trigger their grief, anxiety, and stress. Here are a few phrases that may trigger your loved one:
Just relax, it will happen.
Why don’t you just adopt?
Instead, say how can I help? It is not easy for them to manage everything. Try to help them take one step at a time.
If you’d like to learn more about how to support your loved ones through their infertility journey, check out our social media pages!